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Retirement is good. A few months ago, I set up my computers and phone so that twitter could not function on them. I was trying to quit twitter for a while but couldn’t do it so I just made sure that twitter could not enter my life in any way. It was a great decision and has improved my life greatly. I would recommend it to anyone who uses twitter who would like to have more time and energy to accomplish things that they wanted to do in their life before twitter existed.

Twitter was very fun for a while but it has become a cesspool. I contributed to that cesspool at times but, in general, my twitter was extremely successful. I entertained thousands and arguably millions of people. I know that people have been trying to talk to me on twitter but whatever those people are saying will never make it to me. You may want to try more conventional methods of communication. If you are not interested in doing that, you might be surprised to find out that I do not care.

I conducted an experiment to see if banging my head against a brick wall for two months would accomplish more than using twitter for two months. As it turns out, banging your head against a brick wall for two months actually accomplishes an infinite amount more than using twitter for two months. I’m here for anyone who wants a scholarly debate in an appropriate setting but twitter mainly just gives the people tweeting a temporary burst of dopamine in the brain that tricks them into thinking that they did something important. The effect is similar to the effect that cocaine has on a person’s brain.

The person who is President right now had a lot of mean things said about him on twitter before the election. The mean things said about this person were intended to stop that person from becoming President. Despite having many mean things said about him on twitter, this person still won the election. In my opinion, this proves that saying mean things on twitter about a person running for office does not really help the cause of the person saying the mean things. If I wanted to change things, I probably would stop doing the exact same thing that has been proven to be ineffective but who am I to judge such tactics?

If likes and retweets resulted in election victories then saying mean things on twitter would be the best idea ever. However, that is not how the American electoral process works and, unless you dropped out of school prior to age 12, you would have been educated about the electoral college. If you don’t remember it then that is your fault and not the fault of your school. In addition to grade school education, there is a place called a library that has books in it that you can read for free. If you can not read then you might have trouble voting but I think that you should still be able to. However, if you are going to be mad at the electoral college, you have to be mad at it when your candidate wins and not just when your candidate loses.

Hating the person who is President will not stop that person from being President. It actually will not accomplish a single thing other than making you feel sad or angry. The people who like that President will be happy that you are sad or angry. Giving the opposition exactly what it wants is probably another example of a strategic mistake but I am a complete idiot so what do I know?

I believe that attaching one’s identity to a particular political party is one the dumbest things that a person can possibly do in a free society. It is understandable for one’s identity to be linked to their religion but it is illogical to link your identity to your political party. When you link your identity to your political party, you are choosing for your political party to become your religion.

Politicians are not meant to be worshipped in America. A refusal to worship leaders as gods is one of the main reasons why America became a separate country from England. Over time, some educated people seem to have forgotten this. Additionally, both sides of the aisle undeniably seek and accept corporate contributions which makes America a Corporatocracy and not a Democracy.

In conclusion, Twitter sucks now. It is still better than Facebook, something that I have tried to use a little more, but I think that all social media platforms are pretty limited in their usefulness. I am going to maintain my twitter retirement and enjoy all of the positive things in my life. I wish you all the best in accomplishing whatever your goals and dreams are these days. David Letterman and I are currently having a post-retirement beard growing contest.

Your Friend,

@nachodonut

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ChanningFryeGuys.jpg

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I occasionally do a Google search for Nacho Donut and will often times unearth some gems in the process. I am dumbfounded by what I discovered today.

A company is selling a poster of a Nacho Donut picture for $6.95 . This is their website. It is a place called wallpart.com

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http://wallpart.com/poster/cartoon-nacho-donut-17930244189

Nacho Donut has a lot of pictures. Many of them would make great posters and I am not even mad about this. I remember making this picture but out of all of the pictures that could be made into posters, I just really don’t understand how it ended up being this one. squirrel-print-poster-17930244189

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Donut in Space

Nacho Donut went into space a long time ago so I don’t know if it can be said that this was the “first” donut in space but I must show respect nonetheless.

 

 

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JohnnyOwl22

Cleveland Browns backup quarterback and former Heisman trophy winner Johnny Manziel has been abducted by an owl. Details of his capture are still not clear. Sources close to the situation have told Nacho Donut that this may have to do with owls being mad at Canadian superstar Drake, a Manziel associate. Drake has been using the likeness of an owl to promote “OVO” without the expressed written consent of owls. Owls are generally considered to be full of wisdom so I will not question this Owl’s motive for the abduction of Johnny Football.

OwlJohnny2

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There are a lot of unanswered questions in the world today and I plan to get to the bottom of all of them. I will start with the most important issue as it is something that we all have to live with every day. Of course I am talking about emojis.

This is a screen shot of my most recently used emojis. Yes, this is officially straight off of my phone. I have an iPhone so I may not have the same emojis as you but here is a little window for you to see into the mind of nacho donut. It is kind of like staring directly into the sun so please proceed with caution.

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Something that has perplexed me for some time is this one.

gatorHead

It is not the clearest image of it but I know that you know what I am talking about. It is hard to get a good picture of it because it is an emoji and I am a donut. Although it is a topic for another post, I hope to one day shrink myself down to the size of an emoji and enter their world to learn more about how they live.

The vast majority of emoji’s make some type of sense. Smiley face, not smiley face, frog, panda, arrow, arab man, up, down etc. However, this one remains a mystery. I don’t know what anyone else sees when they look at this but to me, this is an alligator head with reindeer antlers that is on a dinner plate. This thing is disturbing to me. Every time I look through my phone for a witty and situational emoji to use, I end up seeing this thing and I just do not understand it.

To make matters worse, when I tweet the Alligator deer head, it turns into this.

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Now it is a sea monster. Somewhere between my phone and twitter the alligator deer head turns into a sea monster.

I am really confused about what is happening and I don’t know what to do. I am hoping someone out there has the answers.

emoji_apple_64_indexed_256colors

This is a picture of all apple emojis that I have.

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This is the first commercial to ever make people hungry and feel like vomiting at the same time.

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